When I'm tired...

A glimpse:

This past week our refrigerator failed, our repairman was unable to fix it.  We went on a hunt because we were hosting our daughter's graduation party at the end of the week. (yesterday) Guess what? At the time  the fridge was supposed to be  delivered as promised, got a call that it is in fact NOT being delivered.  SO we hosted a party out of coolers and stored food at our church, so grateful for that.  It has been a stressful, long week.

 Lillian also had a dental appointment last week and it did not go well.  She completely regressed and cried and acted out through the entire cleaning.  Thankfully, she is not combative.  Her broken tooth is worse and the cavity above is still there.

Sunday, we all attended church as our third daughter graduated and several others, as well, were honored.  It was a whirlwind day all including LOTS of anxiety by Lillian.  She gagged all through the entire day, she cried terribly when we entered the gym.  My older daughter did some brushing and joint compression on her before we left and we had ear plugs shoved in her ears the best we could, but it was just stressful.

This morning, I asked her to get dressed and that brought on an onslaught of tears, because she simply did not want to change into regular clothes.  This led into terrible crying and gagging as I insisted on brushing her teeth after she had her turn.  This all lasted about 15 to 20 minutes, but it now has me in tears.  The tears come on me just as they do her.  Only, I know why mine fall because in these moments I'm hit with just how different and hard this daily, yes, DAILY walk is and can be. Things that you can't really discuss with all the regular people in your life because they just don't live it.  Or they tell you things that would work for "normal" children. I have raised a few,  this is not my first rodeo.  

Life is just hard sometimes and sometimes you live daily in hardship.  And no one really knows the extent.  Sometimes it's hard to remain optimistic and not discouraged and overwhelmed.  It's 12:51 and no one is crying now.  I'll be thankful and look towards a better day.  Say a little prayer for Momma, I'm a tired and a little emotionally drained today.