Saturday, March 30, 2013

The news

Lillian had a routine visit with Dr Lungs on Thursday and it went very well.  He said it was the most clear he'd ever seen her.  I bragged about how healthy she had been.  Bring on Friday.  All day friday she was abnormally whining.  I mean crying off and on all day.  I don't think she even knew what was wrong, but it was clear by 7 last night that all was not well.  She had started the day with a little bit of gagging, but that it not totally unusual for her, so we didn't pay much attention.  Lillian can see a doctor in the morning and by the afternoon be sick with something they said looked great.  That's how she rolls.  So, 7pm,  vomiting ensued and did not and has not ceased.  I spent the nighttime hours giving slow pushes of ibuprofen, tylenol suppositories and zofran.  She was wretching and gagging with nothing even going in.  As soon as I attempted to start pedialyte, I pushed the button, she started wretching.  She begged me all through the night for drinks, which further made her wretch.  She ran a fever all night long which keeps me on a vigil because she spikes so quickly it causes her to seize.  I sat beside her mopping her with a cold wash cloth, catching her puke with towel after towel, wiping the tears being forced from her eyes.  At some point, I had that overwhelming blessed feeling that I had the privelege of wiping those tiny tears away.  It was an oddly precious moment.
At 3 pm today,  I started a 15cc/hr drip of pediatlyte which we let run for a few hours.  and she slept much of the latter hours, still wretching all the day long.  She spiked a temp again while sleeping.  I have brought her to bed and medicated her hoping she may get some rest tonight.

I have to share,late this afternoon I found myself in one pathetic pity party.  The family had been gone all day participating in activities at our church and all I could think of is that Lillian could not be a part of drastically our life has changed.  How life just seemed to stop.  It brings me to tears as I remember.  Sleep deprivation and early pregnancy probably not the best combination.

So, I'll pray for healing, respite and good rest tonight.  We will spend resurrection Sunday, me and my girl, being thankful for Jesus and tears.  Happy Easter.

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